BACK IN (AND ALMOST OUT OF) THE LAND OF BOBBLE HEADS

Ahhh (or really AGH!), I am back in India again, land of the bobble heads. That is not to say that the Nepali people don't bobble their heads as well but not nearly as much as the Indians. Come to think of it, what exactly does all this bobbling of the head really mean? After 5 weeks in India, I still have absolutely no clue! It seems the options in response to a question are:

• Lots of bobbling with no words
• Lots of bobbling with a grunt or a sigh
• Bobbling with an eye close then continuing to bobble
• A half head nod to one side (this is most confusing as it is often in response to a question about directions and can be confused for the giving of a direction that you should be walking). I really think this means I don't give a $#&%.
• Bobbling with the words "ah, cha, cha, cha". If you get this one, which I never have, you have hit the nail on the head and know you are right on track. I only know of one person that claims to have received this response.

In any case, it was with a HUGE amount of mixed feelings that I decided to catch a bus back to India and into Darjeeling rather than heading up to Kathmandu with Ella and then catching the flight to Mumbai from there. Part of the swaying factor was the $300 that I would have spent to get back to Mumbai (Bombay) and the other part was the fact that, well, really, I did come to India to see India and I had just spent 3 weeks in Nepal - almost half of my trip.

So, on that note, I decided to hop on the bus from Chitwan National Park - my last place in Nepal - and head for the hills of Darjeeling. Supposedly I was going to be traveling on one of the luxury buses (a step up from the tourist buses in Nepal, which are really just crap old buses that run the major tourist routes). Hmmm, lets see, luxury is not quite what I would describe it. After arriving at the stop at 6:00am for the bus and waiting for an hour for it to show up, I was really hoping that it might offer a bit of comfyness. Hee,Hee, HAH! The bus trundled on up, they threw my luggage on top, I prayed they strapped it down as they ushered me on board and stuck me right up next to the front and pointed out the front windscreen and said, "Hah! TV, Yes? You see!" Not sure this is exactly what I wanted. I did want to sit at the front of the bus as it is less bumpy and painful but I really didn't need to see what we were about to hit on a regular basis, and believe me, we were about to hit A LOT of things on the 11+ hour journey.

That brings me to attempting to define a luxury bus...to you or me, luxury bus might be defined as:

Big, clean seats that recline a bit and have arm rests

Air conditioning with tinted windows

Bathroom at the back in case of emergency

Bus built after 1995 with some comfort about it

People all sitting in their respective seats with luggage stowed below the bus, not in the aisles (people and luggage that is, not just luggage)

So what do you get with a luxury bus here in India or in Nepal? You get:

Seats that don't recline or recline so far your head is in the person's lap behind you

An engine that threatens to die every time the bus driver stops to pick up a new passenger, which is frequent and for the most part, not at a bus stop but along the road where they are flagged down by people wanting to go places

Minimum of 20 people in the aisle standing or sitting or really, leaning on you

Possible child in your lap or person next to you in your lap or spitting whatever it is that they chew here over you out the window or into the aisle and hopefully not on the people in the aisle

No toilet, but a couple of stops along the way with the possibility of a shack with a hole dug in the middle for a toilet or a hay stack to crouch behind

A bus built in hmmm, 1940? OK, maybe lets say at least 1950 and if you are lucky, 1960.

Stickers of random American pop stars and Indian Bollywood stars plastered on the front window and if you are lucky, above each seat to help denote where you sit...maybe they should just say, "miss, you are in Brittany Spears Pepsi Commercial pic"

A driver with a horn that won't quit - sometimes held down for a span of 30+ seconds. This is particularly nice when you are at the front.

Oh, again, if you are really lucky, you might get a man next to you that feels the need to attempt to rub his legs against yours or his arms across your chest. Yes, I did get lucky enough to have this happen. Started with excessive staring - he was facing me (should have picked my nose or something). Then he moved into the seat next to me. First attempt was rubbing my ankle with his nasty dirty foot, which resulted in a quick stomp - me hoping it was on his toe. His next approach was with the arm. Started with pushing up against me more and more and then an attempt at sliding his entire elbow across my chest. As you can guess, this resulted in a quick arm up and push from my side. Had he kept it up, he might not have had any family jewels to start a family with.

Overall the bus ride was fairly uneventful and mostly just uncomfortable. The most frustrating thing was getting rid of my Nepali money at the border as all of the money changers appeared to be out of money or just not bothered to help as they all had their windows up and were sitting at there as if waiting for someone to come along and change money. Very frustrating. In the end, the immigration officer changed my money into Indian rupees and I carried on my way across a very long bridge - thankfully my pack is not too heavy and after the long bus ride and frustrations of trying to change money, I needed a good walk to clear my head.

It was quite clear that I was back in India. As soon as I tried to take a bus, I had five different people grabbing me an telling me their bus was better or faster or cleaner or cheaper. Really they all looked the same and they were all the same price and well, all took about the same amount of time. I think a shop keeper took pity on me as he stopped me, asked where I wanted to go and helped usher me on to a bus and very clearly said "Pay 15 rupees...no more, 15 rupees!". I was hoping to head all of the way to Darjeeling after crossing the border but it was already 7:00 at night and another 3 - 3 1/2 hours in a bus did not sound too fun. So, I opted to stop in Siliguri - or sort of was forced to stop as I have no idea if the jeeps were even going to Darjeeling that late. Found a pricey hotel as there were no other options but did get a TV and room service! Boy this sounds posh eh? Really it was still a drab, white walled, slightly dingy room with a tiny little 10 inch TV and the room service was only because they did not have a restaurant area. Still, it was nice to relax and see a little bit of what is going on in the world.

Next day I was up and out for my 2 1/2 hour roller coaster ride up the hill to Darjeeling. The road is absolutely crazy. This was one time that I wished the driver would use his horn a little more often. We came flying around blind corners on a road that was meant for one way traffic, barely missing flying off the mountain. All along the route were signs about living and not driving too fast. Two of my favorites are: "Donate Blood, Just Not On This Road" and "Go Slowly on Earth, Not Quickly to Eternity". There was one other about if you were married drive slow or something but I didn't catch all of it. Hell, I just wanted the guy to stop trying to pass every car and truck while four others were coming at us. Made it safely though and have been spending my last few days here in Darjeeling drinking tea, hanging out with other travelers and wandering around the small, quiet city.

When it is clear you can see the Himalayas and it is quite amazing. The city itself drapes along the mountainside and where it stops, turns into tea plantations that continue all the way into the valley. It is quite beautiful.l As you can imagine, I am consuming my fair share of tea. It has been very pleasant wandering around the tea plantations, stopping in at the zoo to see red pandas, tigers (that I didn't see in the wild) and snow leopards as well as going to the Himalayan Hiking Institute to see the history of climbing Everest. Oh, did I mention that I am at the base (well not really base but within seeing distance) of the third highest mountain in the world? It is called Kanchanjunga and is 8,834m high - the second highest being K2 and highest being Everest. Supposedly on a clear day you can see Everest from here but it has not been that clear.

This morning we gave it a try with an early morning sunset (left at 4:00am) but no such luck. Got a nice sunset and a quick glimpse of the mountains before the fog rolled in but that was about it - oh, other than the 300 other people up there who, when the sun just started to come out, all went "ahhhh, oooohhh, ahhhh"(it wasn't even that spectacular of a sunset). and the vendors shouting "coffee, coffee" "postcards". Where the tea was, I never discovered, which is quite funny for India since they drink so much tea and also a little odd since we are in a major tea producing region. Back down from the sunset now and just passing some time before I get my jeep back down the hill to the train station. Looks like another hair raising ride before I hit my very last overnight train in India. Cannot believe that I have only two days left here. Have to get my mind ready for the noise and chaos of Calcutta and Mumbai (sigh).

Oh, I have a new favorite word - Pagael - it means crazy or mad. We started calling Ella "Ella Bola" on the hiking trip, which means "Crazy Ella" as she was always giggling. When we got to Chitwan, we told the Guest House manager and he taught us Pagael. Of course, that resulted in me calling Ella "Miss Pagael". It is a fun sounding word anyway...